So…
I’m not usually the kind of individual to kink disgrace, however we actually want to speak about these weird-a** fetishes that appear to be working rampant on Fox Information and within the warped world of right-wingers typically.
Why do Fox Information pundits and their friends have their star-spangled Klanny-panties all in a bunch over new Minnie Mouse and M&M cartoon design adjustments?
On Wednesday, Fox host Jesse Watters introduced on sunken place misplaced and located mascot Candice Owens to speak about what she seems to suppose is a vital challenge—Disney placing Minnie Mouse in a blue and black polka dot pantsuit as an alternative of her traditional purple and white polka dot skirt.
“For this reason individuals don’t take these individuals severely,” Owens griped. “They’re taking all these items that no one was offended by till they need to do away with them and destroy them as a result of they’re bored.”
“They’re making an attempt to destroy the material of our society,” she continued.
So, I feel all of us perceive what’s happening right here, proper?
Candace Owens needs to start out a Minnie Mouse OnlyFans as a result of she’s tapped into the spank financial institution market of conservative males who need feminine cartoon animals sitting on their faces—which might work out significantly better in the event that they’re carrying skirts as an alternative of pantsuits.
Anyway, what Owens—who seems to be carrying some form of go well with whereas complaining about Minnie carrying some form of go well with—doesn’t understand is that she, properly, doesn’t know WTF she’s speaking about. Even when she was addressing an actual challenge, which she’s not, actually nobody has complained about how Minnie Mouse attire. No person. Not a single physique. Past that, Minnie’s snazzy new threads usually are not even meant to be a everlasting change to the character’s design.
As Newsweek reported: “The costume was created by dressmaker Stella McCartney to mark Disneyland Paris’ thirtieth anniversary. The redesign is meant to be worn solely in March, by these in a Minnie Mouse costume performing on the theme park.” So whereas Owens is nervous about “the material of our society” in America, the pantsuit is definitely associated to a Disneyland that isn’t in America in any respect. It’s virtually as if somebody must get the hell over herself and cease being offended over nothing.
Owens additionally talked about the M&Ms non-troversy that Fox host Tucker Carlson lamented on his present just lately.
That’s proper, of us, Carson just lately received deep in his emotions over the brown M&M cartoon being “much less attractive” as a result of she’s just lately been depicted carrying low heels and tennis footwear as an alternative of excessive stilettos.
Carlson would possibly as properly simply go forward and admit he needs to f*** an M&M. Simply go forward and say you need them melting in your mouth, your hand and varied different surfaces and orifices the sweet deal with was not essentially supposed for. I’m certain someplace in Victoria’s Secret’s huge catalog is lingerie made to suit a human-size round sweet shell physique. (I’m guessing he likes his M&Ms thick too, he’s simply nervous about creating a peanut allergy.)
Simply saying, this can be a bizarre fetish, guys. Simply actually bizarre.
